Monday, May 23, 2011

Purging, moving, 9 year old's anxiety....

Yesterday we cleaned out the playroom of the girls. Being 9 now is a different stage in their lives. When we came here 3 years ago the girls were still so much into playing with toys, playing dress-up, coloring, crafting, you name it and they did it.

But being 9 is a whole different ball game!



So when the 3 of us were purging and sorting out their room we took out 10 FULL garbage bags with toys, coloring books that were full, games and puzzles that were not complete anymore.... kids don't clean up after they play and then things get misplaced or lost.... But we also still had a lot of stuff that is still good enough to give to another child. Well, our housekeeper will take care of that. Everything goes to her and she either gives it away or sells it. Probably the latter... which I don't blame her!

But for the girls this move is another step in their lives. The anxiety is building up a bit. They are afraid that because we will not be there when our stuff gets moved that a lot of their precious things are getting stolen. I don't blame them, because that is the story their heard through the grapevine.... Adults talking to each other without realizing that little ears are listening too.....



Although we are just moving about 10 minutes away, it is still a move. We do need to pack, unpack and redecorate our new house. Finding a new spot in the house, being comfortable in their new bedroom, saying goodbye to the old! Not always easy for a 9 year old. But I am trying to make this move as fun as possible and try to ease their anxiety by letting them pack a box full of their most precious stuff, tape it ourselves and give it to a friend who is so generous to let us stack a few boxes in her garage. (Thanks Ingrid!) So then when we come back from our long break in Holland and the USA we pick up our boxes and unpack these ourselves. That will ease their anxiety...

It must be weird for the girls that this time we don't see the movers come and pack everything, now we just live here for the last 3 weeks, go on vacation, and when we come back immediately go to the new house. And a lot of the things will be in its place already. So for a disclosure point of view, there is none. It will all happen so sudden for them.... but our girls are strong rooted and I am sure they can handle it! By the time they are going to college they will be pros in moving!!

Funny also when we looked at some homes we talked to the girls about each having their own bedroom, since in this house they will be from 9 to about 12 years old. A different phase in their lives, maybe one they need and want more privacy. But they said NO with a definite tone in their voice. However, now Jasmine was talking about that not always JJ's friends are her friends anymore and she feels sometimes a bit left out, so maybe it would be a good idea to each have their own room?? Which of course is fine with me, but I am wondering if after a long vacation she still feels the same. We will see. She has to put the pros and cons in a row and see how it adds up. Because each their own room, would also mean NO play room anymore... And sometimes Jasmine has nightmares and she creeps into JJ's bed, well if she is in another room, that is not that easy. I will keep you posted on the development of the bedrooms :-)

With the girls turning 9 we are definitely going into a new phase in their lives. Will be interesting to say the least!!



At least they have each other to go through this, that is the big advantage of being a TWIN!! A sibling that is one the same emotional level as you, so that makes life already better most of the time!!

Tell me, what do you do to ease your child's mind before moving?? Do you have tips and tricks for me?
Please share, I can use all the help! Always good to hear somebody else's experience!!

Have a Marvelous Monday!
Mireille xx

3 comments:

plantagenet said...

Let them choose their most precious things into a suitcase, box or whatever and and find a "safe" place at a friends house, maybe? To watch over it.... It is a good exercise for choosing and look over 'precious' again. It helped once with my daughter. Well, we brought it to the grandparents, but I am sure you will find a 'substitute' friend as family member....
Yeah, it will be interesting how they deal with this.....its another uprooting experience....love to you all

Leah and Maya said...

I have heard form people of stuff getting stolen and thats in our country where we aren't so in need. It must feel good though to get rid of stuff and live in a country where you know it will be used again, I did love that about Guatemala. I wll say with moving they totally read into what you are feeling.
I would let them have seperate rooms so they have them if they want but maybe have a trundle bed or something like that so they can still sleep together.

Mireille said...

Great idea Leah! and Ginser... I think you skipped one paragraph...

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