As an adoptive parent you have to proof yourself so much towards so many people before you are allowed to adopt. In one way it is good, in the other way I hated that part, because every little 'fool' can have a baby, but we as addoptive parents have to proof to be fit, sane and whatever they check for to become a parent.
Well, since it is cold and rainy here in SA (yeah, I didn't realize it could be also not so nice here) I am a bit browsing on the net and I found this article on the About site. Althoug the article is from 2007 I still like to share it with you, because I know some of my readers are adoptive parents and sure will like this article as well.
New Study Finds Adoptive Parents More Invested in Their Children than Biological Parents.
A new study published in the American Sociological Review and funded by the National Science Foundation, the Spencer Foundation, and the American Educational Research Association, showed that adoptive parents spend more money and time on their children. 13,000 households with first-graders in the family showed that adoptive parents spend more time reading to their children, eating together, and talking with them about their problems. It was suggested that some of the reasons for this could include:
Most adoptive parents went through a lot to have children in their lives.
Most adoptive parents live in an environment that says that what they do is not real parenting - so they tend to over compensate.
In general, the adoptive parents were older and wealthier than biological parents that were a part of the study.
It was also noted that adoptive parents that faired the best were two parent adoptive families and scored high on criteria such as helping with homework, parent involvement with school, involvement with cultural activities, and family church attendance.
Where did the adoptive parents falter, the frequency in which they talk with parents of other children.
Who also did well in this study, gay and lesbian parents. It was noted that the discrimination that they face as a family may drive them to go the extra mile as parents.
Some researchers called into question the argument that children are best off with their biological parents.
I think Adam Pertman, executive director of the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute said it best when asked about this study's findings, "It's an affirmation that there are all sorts of families that are good for kids. Adoptive parents aren't less good or better. They just bring different benefits to the table. In terms of how families are formed, it should be a level playing field."
What I know for sure is that we have 2 beautiful, happy and well adjusted children who see adoption as part of their lifes, but it doesn't overwhelm their reality. It's like one of the many facts in life, and for now they don't pay much attention to the fact that they are adopted. Maybe this will come up later in their teen years, but as study points out that we are quite invested in our family, so I am sure we can deal with it when it comes passing by! I also agree with Adam Pertman that adoptive parents aren't less good or better. A loving environment is very important and if that environment means 2 mothers, 2 fathers, single parent or a mother and a father that is not important.
If you are an adoptive parent, please share your site with me!